It's been a while since my last update. I've been working an average of about 30 hours a week (mixed between in office and home) and it's taken everything out of me. Slowly I've felt like I was getting better. Then a week ago last Saturday happened. I kind of over did it that day and by that night I was in pretty severe pain. I missed church for the first time in over a month. Last week was one of my worst pain weeks. I really had trouble sleeping with all the pain. Wednesday night I didn't sleep at all. I tried everything but the pain won that night. I had to cancel my physical therapy appointment for the next morning as I was in too much pain to do that. Getting through work last Thursday and Friday was extremely difficult. I was really struggling. I talked to one of the sets of Sisters sometime during that time and they reminded me of a talk another set of Sisters had recently given to me. It's called "Give Us This Day Our Daily Bread". It's by Elder D. Todd Christofferson of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. It was given at a CES Fireside for young adults in January. In it he talked about the children of Israel and when they were in the wilderness and were provided manna every day. They were only given enough to get them through one day. By doing that they had to put their trust in the Lord that He would provide again the next day and it also always kept Him on their mind. He related some other stories as well. One about Navy Seals going through training and how difficult and painful it was. Their leader would often tell them not to focus on what they still had to do but only focus on getting through what they needed to right then. One quote was "Take it one day at a time....Don't look ahead to the pain. Just get through the day." I love that quote! I'm thinking about printing that and hanging it in my house so that I can look at it especially on the really bad days.
Another story was of a woman going through chemo and she was telling her mother that she just couldn't do it 16 more times. Her mother responded by asking her if she could do it today. She responded she could. Then her mother said that's all you have to do. You just have to make it through today.
Talking about the Lord's prayer and the part that says "Give us this day our daily bread" Elder Christofferson says "I believe that we would all readily acknowledge that we have needs each day that we want our Heavenly Father's help in dealing with. For some, one some days, it is quite literally bread - that is, the food needed to sustain life that day. It could also be spiritual and physical strength to deal with one more day of chronic illness or a painfully slow rehabilitation. In other cases it may be less tangible needs, such as things related to one's obligations or activities in that day - teaching a lesson or taking a test, for example."
I really liked this talk and am grateful to the Sisters for reminding me of it. It does help me to better focus on each day at hand.
I was still in a lot of pain through this past weekend and unfortunately missed church once again. I really don't like missing it - especially not two Sunday's in a row. A friend from church was going to give me a ride that morning and when she called I told her I wasn't able to make it. She then said she would bring me dinner that night. She called that afternoon and then offered to send one of her kids over to pick me up and bring me to her house for dinner. She thought I could probably use to see something other than my four walls. She was so right. I was in pain and stayed pretty medicated but I was also feeling very frustrated and somewhat discouraged that my pain was so severe for so long. I had thought I was getting better and then to have a week like that was just really hard. It's often said that Heavenly Father blesses you through others and that was true on Sunday. I didn't even realize how much I needed to get out and see people until I was there. I was still in a ton of pain but they were very accommodating and I was able to relax while I was there. It was really nice to spend time with such good people and not just be focused on my pain. Thank you to the Sherman family!!!
I have lots of people to be thankful for. I'm grateful for all those who either come and help do things for me around the house, those that call, text, visit, or pray for me. I feel very blessed despite all that is happening.
